Judge — January 1938 — page 83: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

HIGH HAT (Continued from page 22) such a thing. He is a stickler for etiquette and knows his Emily Post as well as any other post. It has been rumored that a dog will sometimes abandon his professional career to investigate a flea, but Junior has never seen such a thing, and it will have to be proved to him. The horse racing season is split. Tropi- cal Track opens January 11 and runs a couple of months, with another session April 9, while Hialeah operates from January 5 to March 12. Many of the tourists have, in past years, been going home at the end of the Hialeah season, but lately they have been sticking around until the closing of the Tropical Track, since some of the horses which have been doing their bit for equinimity are held over. Boxing and wrestling are in charge of the American Legion. The Coral Gables Coliseum has staged fights between champs and near champs, and there are various arenas given over to wrestling. The other night your correspondent le‘t his bower long enough to take in a wrestling tournament at the 7th Armory Arena, the final “attraction” being a woman's match between a Tarzaness from Georgia and one from Tennessee. The brunette threw the blonde and that was that. The referee took more punish- ment than either of the contestants, but no doubt that’s as it should be. Football is being played in these parts after it has been abandoned in the North, and the Roddy Burdine Stadium is the mecca of devotees of the pigskin sport. Mr. Burdine, who was head of Miami's largest department store, died recently, and the Stadium was named in his honor. When college teams aren't playing there, it is turned over to high school aggrega- tions, and is kept busy much of the time. Tue Jai-Alai (Hi-Li to you) season will be opening soon. Hi-Li is one of the fastest, wickedest games which has come to your correspondent's attention. A close study of the game seems to indicate there are absolutely no rules, but I may be wrong. At any rate, there are no rules observable to the naked eye. A player on one team has full liberty to slug a player on the opposing team over the conk with one of those scoop things. The ball (pelota) goes zinging back and forth with a speed that would knock your eye out. The players, most South Americans, manufacture the pelota and cesta them. selves, and are very finicky indeed in de. termining their exact texture and weight. The cesta is the wickerwork gadget and the pelota is a trifle smaller than a base- ball. : There are singles and doubles games, and occasionally triples, and the betting is fast and furious. Attendants go in among the audience taking bets and sell- ing, or at least trying to sell dolls and little bears. On top of the stands is a well-equipped ballroom, where an or- chestra plays, and below decks is an even better equipped barroom, where the win. ners may celebrate and the losers drown their sorrows. : Until liquor came in the pharmacists, we hear, were dispensing kodak supplies, stamps, inner tubes, insect exterminators and the like, and were having a terrible time making both ends meet. But now the more eminent apothecaries have set up package stores, are riding high and thinking about paying their 1934 income taxes. Tue most vexatious problem in these parts is that of parking and more indig- nant Letters to the Editor are written by Pro Bono than you can shake a typewriter at. Mr. Bono feels he is justified, and no doubt he is. Perhaps you want to go into a department store to buy a seventy-five cent tie or a bottle of smelling salts or a parcheesi set. You can’t park on the main | drag, because in front of every store there is a No Parking sign in yellow paint, and there might be a cop around. You can, of course, invest two bits in a parking lot across the street, or you can go over to Biscayne Boulevard and start dropping coins into a slot machine. At any rate, by the time you emerge your little shopping jaunt will have cost you a pretty penny (who ever heard of an ugly penny?) and your tie or your smelling salts or your game won't be worth the wear and tear on your nerves, to say nothing of your wallet. Possibly at some future date these Pro Bonos may stage a parking strike and get the administration to do something about it. But at present there doesn’t seem to be any unity of action. That's the situation today. It may be different six months from now, because when we-all Suthernors, suh, from New York and Des Moines and Nogales and Windsor Locks get together we get right indignant. We're a strong, silent race, and we can be pushed just so far. Then ovr dander rises and we make the Span. ish moss fly. —JunceE, Jr. How Many Mistakes In This Picture? N drawing this picture the artist made between thirty and forty mistakes. How many can you find? The Judge now offers you a chance to subscribe for a year to the best humorous magazine in the country, simply by detecting the correct number of mistakes and filling in the coupon below. For example: The man in the foreground has no ears, the lady smoking the cigar in the fireplace has on only one rubber boot and is not reading The Judge, the chimney of the house is under the sideboard, etc., etc. Isn’t it fun! See how many others you can find. Filling in the coupon below will not be considered a mistake. On the contrary—it is the one thing about the whole picture that’s sensible. | 18 EAST 48TH STREET | New York City ! Dear Sirs: I am rectifying all mistakes, and starting the new year right, {by becoming a regular sub- | scriber to The Judge. Please |enter my subscription for: 1 Year at $1.50 and bill me later. comicbooks.com