Judge — February 1937 — page 27: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

aaqtittinstnd "Look, Tweedles, the Canary Islands.” = AE Ditty for a Dude Rancher Somewhere west of West New York Is where I want to be, With a prancing pony underneath And a bowie knife deep in a sheath And the west wind whistling free. Somewhere west of West New York Upon a high plateau, With a swimming pool in the bathing shed, With electric fixtures overhead And a radiator by my bed When nights are ten below! Somewhere west of West New York Where man and beast are proud, Where the redskins dance around their tents— For twenty-five or fifty cents, Depending on the crowd. ‘Way out west where men are men And life is not effete, Where you dine on duck and squab and grouse, ‘Where a man can see a Mickey Mouse In the first-run moving picture house That's just across the street! Ship me west of West New York, A million miles away, ‘Where the coyotes scream and the lions roar— In Newark, Trenton, Camden or In Phil-a-del-phi-a! Let me ride the rugged range Beneath the starry dome, With the cowboy suit and a cowboy hat, A pneumatic rubber saddle mat And a round.trip airline ticket that - Will take me right back home! —ArTHUR L. LipPMANN, The First Solo Flight “I hope I'm going fast enough . . . Ooooooo! . . . I'm in the air now... Wow! ... It's a long way down there! ... I don’t like this as much as I thought I would . . . I don’t like it at all! . .. Wonder if I'm doing all right? ... Up and up and up... * It's about time I leveled off . . . Must be at least a thousand ‘feet altitude by this time... Hey! . .. I'm tipping! . . . What was it the instructor said to do? . . . Ah, that's a little better .-. Oops! My stomach feels funny! . .. Maybe my wife wasn’t kidding after all when she said I ought to take along a couple of sandwiches and some coffee . . . Bet I'm doing two hundred miles an hour! . . . And I'm nearly frozen, too . . . Believe me, if I ever get down safe I'll stay on the ground where I belong .-- I wish I hadn't gone in for this sort of thing . . . They said I'd probably break my neck unless I took a few more lessons ... Oooh! . .. I'm starting down now! . .. Gosh, I didn’t in- tend to stay up this long . . . Seems like hours and hours . . . I'm going down too fast! . . . Too fast . . . too fast! ... And I'm twisting to the left . . . I'll go into a side-slip sure! . . . 1 can’t do anything about it! .. . My legs won't move! . . . I'm going to crack up! ... I know I am! .. . Look at the ground come up at me! . . . I can’t straighten out! ... Help! Help! . . . Oooooh! . . . Hurry! . . . Get me out of here, somebody! What? ... Yes, I think I'm all right! . . . What's that? . . . Eleven feet? . .. Only eleven? . . . Say, you must be crazy! . . . I went at least five miles! ... And I'll be hanged if I ever try another ski jump!” "The next request comes from Gus and Anna— parked in a Buick on Old Orchard Road!” Judge comicbooks.com