Judge — April 1934 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

HIGH Some Beachy Items (Collected During a Recent Vacation on the Half Shell at Palm Beach) ENERALLY spe ida ha ng, this was the biggest year Flor- ad since everything went boom, and accommo- arcer than courteous courtesy cops. e night I arrived I could find no place to roost for the night. So I slept in a cocoanut tree. dations were I'd have been there yet except a family named Ginzberg has leased it for the season. Palm Beach is really Coney Island in a tuxedo, All the rich bathe in full dress & the women in evening wraps. West Palm Beach is inhabited by bank tellers, etc. It is sepa- rated from Palm Beach by Lake Worth & the Social Register. There were nightly benefits played at the Palm Beach night clubs. Most of them were for the benefit of the night club owners. The servants of the rich have servants of their own. The ser- vants also have their night clubs. The Show Boat at West Palm Beach is the most popular. It is possible to vacation at Palm Beach for nothing. At the end of the island there is a huge unopened hotel known as Sing- er’s Folly. The wind breathes siroccos thru its unboarded win- dows; the sea lolls pleasantly outdoors. Pitch your tent in- doors and stay as long as you like—rentless. The Hisses, the Hesses & the Hosses winter yearly in Palm Beach. The local saying goes: “Ll Hiss & Ul Hess & I'll Blow Your Hoss Down.” Some of the rich are so ex- clusive they talk only to them- selves. The two Queen Bees of Palm Beach are Mrs. Stotesbury & Mrs. Rae. Each struggle for the right to entertain the visiting socialite. Last week Mrs. Stotes- bury got the leg of Mrs. De Peyster for lunch and Mrs. Rae got Mrs. P.’s liver. It is extremely desirable to be invited to one of the big houses Palm Beach. One can slip unnoticed into a wing and s many months as he likes absolutely unmolested. *s family at that. The gasoline tax in Florida is 8c per gal. The gas itself is 13c. It is cheaper to pay the tax and walk, Everywhere is the store & the dime emporium. ow they take away from the simple paradise of the tropics and I suppose you've heard of the Helpsie Selfsie Stores all through the South. Fish which is commoner in Palm Beach than poor rela- tions costs as much as 60e per Ib. e price of i picture taken next to a dummy sailfish went up this y owing to the scarcity of sailfish. The current this season wa itive expression ‘ome back and see us sometime.” A grin ac- companied it. Both were de- livered on handing you a Dill of $25 a night for a hotel room worth $4. Everyone played shuffleboard. That is, if he wasn't too feeble to stand up and lean against his shuffleboard poke. After the “season” is over houses on Palm Beach drop in rentals from $3000 per month to $30. It ain't so social but it’s cool (so the chamber of com- merce says). Trade winds blow 17 hrs. out of the 24. The trouble is, as I see jt, they don’t blow in any trade. The rich enjoy their homes 4 months. The caretakers 12. Hurricanes are much in de- mand down here. After a hur- ricane business booms for the interior decorators, glass mak- ers and palm tree breeders. Driving down to Palm Beach practically my only amusement was seeing purple liveried peo- ple crawling under Rolls Royces for tinker work. Orange juice was cheap as usual and I discovered that an orange in the North doesn't taste anything like an orange. I recommend Temple Oranges with thin skins and very red complexions. I also will never again patronize a restaurant (Page 27, please) comicbooks.com