Judge — January 9, 1932 — page 24: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

AIG: Odd Fellow ) ac and I ran into him at a party. M His. “ In the clatter and crush nobody noticed him. He sat in the library and did queer things to the radic ‘ardon us,” said Mae, bursting in on him, “are you always like this, or is everything all right——" The fellow had just turned the dial as a program started. He had found a loud praising soap, and stopped to listen, Mac and I fiddled while the advertising went on. Then, just as the entertainment started, he switched again, “Hey, what is this,” protested Mac, “that program sounded as if it were going to be darn good.” “Hush!” said the boy. He had found another station. “I didn’t quite get the name of the vacuum cleaner the guy says is the world’s dirt remover.” So we had to listen to a lot of clap-trap about a rug cleaner. But, just as the all-star movie actors were announced, the fellow in switched the dis “Say can see you're a man of aid Mac. “What's all that over there in your waste-basket? “Oh, those are the books I've thrown away,” said the fellow. “I do not like books.” “Well, why do you buy them?” said Mac, flabbergasted for once in his life. “Why, to read the jackets, course.” He turned back to the radio. , I think we ought to be able to in on a mos 'n Andy to kid him, voice cried Mac, trying AT “Oh, I do like Amos ’n Andy,” said the fellow seriously, “the part about, ‘Brush your tecth three times a day, see your dentist at least twice a year,’ i ccllent—one of the best, isn’t it?” ‘nthusiasm is a pretty thing to murmured Ma Do you ever Saturday ning Post?” see, breathed the guy fervent ly. “It's my favorite, if they only wouldn't print so many stories and articles with their advertising. It's quite distracting and annoying.” Mae rose. “Fellow,” he si a great man. But tell me you, for heaven's sake The fellow smiled. “Me?” he said, “I'm the fellow they write radio ad- vertising for!” you're Who are A Stakka Weets! O 34th Street from the nn Station, is a little eat-house that has a unique window display When I first passed by, fighting my way thru an absorbed mob of rubber- necks, I refused even to glance in the direction of the window. 1 prided myself on being a busy man, with no time to waste on such nonsense. Well, sir, the next time I passed I had to look, and ever since then I’ve been staring thru that window on an aver- age of fifteen minutes a day. The dis- play consists of a very complicated machine which makes wheat- It's a round tank, with a smaller su- perstructure rising out of the top of it, from which the dough drops down to a circular arrangement, that moves slowly around the top edge of the tank. Three cakes (one order) drop across sa us! PoDBN US: ~ ARE Yow) ALWAYS Like THS: CR IS NERHHING act’ out one by one and travel half-way round th nk, which browns them on one side. Then the most uncanny cake-turner reaches out automatically from the upper part of the machine and turns each cake as neat as you please, and they continue their ride round to where they started. There another inhumanly human — turner ches out and flops them onto a te, one at a time, and the order is A truly super-Rube Goldber invention, Girls Disliked (A Piece Without a Reason) ints with small appetites; girls who tingle with bangles; girls who turn out the light; girls who tell parlor storics apologetically; girls who've been to college; girls with hair line eyebrows; girls who call me at 3a. Moz girls on whom one drink has a pronounced effect; girls on whom 30 drinks have no effect; girls you meet on blind dates; from artistic girls; girls who must terested mentally, morally, and spir- itually before they'll go ont; girls who live in Flatbush, Astoria or the Bronx; 1s who wander from your table after you've brought ‘em; girls you bring and don’t sce the rest of the night; girls who tell you the truth about yourself; girls who are lovely and know it; girls who need more th one mink coat; girls who a a pl rls with “d girls who are serious; girls who reputations for repartee; girls who ex- ercise; girls who marry the other fel- low; girls who review movies; girls who live in hotels in West 40th and irls comicbooks.com