Judge — January 31, 1931 — page 23: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

¥ ] ] i : j A | { 1 . t g 1 ; t 0 d - ° ture dealt in the main with the con- ceit of the gangster there might be a few in the theatre watching them- selves preen around the screen. Well, when the lights went up, I looked around, Ten will get you twenty if the house wasn't packed with gorillas. Half the better known mobsmen in town were present. ‘Two cops lin- yered in the rear, probably sneaking off duty on the corner to do so. And, who knows, perhaps that gent who breathed Bacardi down my neck in Row K was the lad who gave Mr. Rothstein his one-way ticket to para: dise. The tip’s free, Mr. Mulroone Tweet, Tweet Y ou have, doubtless, been wanting to know the true story of those two canaries on the Cheerio Program of the National Bro: ting Co. (and if you haven't anyhow). They : boy, the property of a Mrs. Freeman, who brings them to work every a.m, muffled in velvet robes, shawls, ete. Each has his own tiny microphone over which he twitters and tweets from 8.30 to 9 every mornin: In the summer Dickie and Blucboy have a three weeks’ vy ion (for molting, ete.), and then their understudies are brought to the studio to perform in their place, The understudies aren't so hot, but they aren't nearly so tem- peramental either, which relieves the strain on everyone in the studio, in- cluding the numerous lackeys whose only job is to cater to the wants, needs, ete., of Dickie and Bluey. ing to know, Unimportant Items Gs are so bad in New York rting circles that the prelimi- fighters at the Madison Square “i= YEZ Swee \S Soivep, Se! — X Garden are allowed to cat sponges between rounds. their They would have you believe that the Pope himself issued the notice which removed oldi from Notre Dame for violating the celibacy act, Joe Two drunks were out driving. The was furious. A sudden “Whoosh!” The other clutched at the driver and cried: “Fa gossakes, lookout. Y hit th wagon ilmos’ ked the driver. They say many animals don’t mind ing in the zoo since they frequently don’t know their surroundings from the jungle. Thus, a female tiger will often drag her newborn cubs bac forth across the cage until she has traveled miles and miles—the idea being to keep them from being eaten by their daddy! Quite recently they opened a very swell hostelry in Havana called the Nacio nd on the opening night they g great big ball in the great big ballroom and the students outside in the strect who haven't been behavy- ing very well down there lately threw some at big tear bombs through the and the guests all had to window \ BUSINESS ‘1S —— So BAD IN FichT CIRAES / WOULD You MIND CHANGING leave the dance floor, but not before some Casabianca in the orchestra held his ground and struck up the strains of... you'll never gu With Tears in My Eyes.” —"Dancing And there is a good Christian § ence story making the rounds which has nothing to do with hired men. A gentleman was seen to rise in a thea tre during the performance and ask loudly, “Is there a Christian Scientist in the house?” A nice old person rose and said, “I, sir, am one!" The first gentleman said, “Then, would you mind changing seats with me? I'm sit- ting in a draft.” High Tone Stuff you've come into a couple of lion dollars and happen up to the Central Park Casino these nights for dinner, you may be tapped on the shoulder by a mysterious gent and asked to come with him—draggee and I. With the air of a dick, he will usher you into a pine room and you will be told to stand up against a bar. Well, sir, when you get over the shock you find that you are in none other than the new Central Park Casino Oyster Bar, swanky and magnificent in pine trimmings, and you are to partake of the oysters you orc The pine, by the way, is real, genuine knots in it and rough looking. Behind the bar is an expert’ oyster opener, and, boy, does he make the shells fly! Only don’t call them oys- He's a Columbia University graduate and “ersters” is what they're called around the College with the Asphalt Campus. Gey ters. comicbooks.com