Judge — January 31, 1931 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Et? Question: Wuierr you pin KEEPING yourseLF? Here again the authorities differ widely. For instance, Pi (Oxford) here advances the answer, “Up in Mabel’s room And Kleppitstein (Heidelberg) comes out with, “The League of Nations”! Is it any wonder that we have dissension, dissen- sion, dissensio! Will these savants ever get smartened up? ‘The only reply in this case is—“Out of your sight, mug!” Question: Do you pray packoammon? This, the last question I shall take up in this week's paper, s fortunately escaped the attention of European pundits. Of course Ong Lu has answered a similar query in h reply to the question, “Do you play Chinese ches: is neither here nor there. Backgammon has not yet swept over Eurasia the way it has swept over the United States so for the time being I have worked out the following little side for use in the present overwhelming emergency—"No, I do not. Iam not interested. I do not want to know how. I will not learn, And the next so and so who asks me if I play is going to get smacked right on the nose, in the New York manner.” now famous " But that Pact Parmer Modern Exercises for Tiny Tots re the pre the man dy has t The po-lice-man stands on the - corner in the snow. Why does he stay = in the cold? Frank has closed his = res-tau-rant. = k wa-gon. Is ride? No, he The bishop has gone to mar-ket. He has a big basket of money. How did he go to market? The bishop will not tell. See the Judge, how he runs. Where is the Judge going? Nobody knows. The t. He waves hi —P.L. JUDGE “Relax y’self, Officer—I’m only usin’ thi “Tf you're going to France, my dear, you must have Eloise give you the address of that place where she got her husband!” ndow "cause m’iife just painted th’ porch.” Parts of a Cinema Palace There’s the lobby, the mezzanine, the orchestra, the balcony and the corral where they keep you roped in until they find seats behind posts for you. Things You'll Never See Geeu in modern dress. Hoover coming out for repeal. The Life of Rudy Vallee, by Emil Lud- wig. Visitors trying to avoid getting tanned in Florida. Rotogravure picture of bathing beautics with girls up to their necks in water. Police framing themselves on their days off. The car that hits you.