Judge — November 1, 1930 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

IGA LAAT One from Heywood Broun [7° swanky omas’ Church, on Fifth Avenue. ked a shabby negro. After due inquiry and some difficulty, he located the rector of same and said to him: “Sah, I'd like to join dis chu’ch.” The rector of St. Thomas’ “My good 1 > you live "was the reply. hen don’t you think it might be wise for you to join a church in your own neighborhood?” “Yas, sah, but I de- sires to join dis chu Phe doctor pondered. “My m pose you go home and pray ‘over this impor- tant step?” This the negro agreed to do. rector. “Rectah,” he said, “I went home like you tole me and prayed to de Lawd how could I get into St. Thomas’ Chu’ch, appeared an’ sai ask Me—I can't Maself!'" and God He awdy, man, don’ st into dat chu’ch ZL WL/o, BOLERO, ~ AND PARK AVA # FOR. OCCUAATS AND CAR, vy - TIMMANY 1S MAD AS EXER Ting My Coach and Four Cylinders, James! Arte" studying, man and boy, for twenty-five years, the riding hab- its of those grand Duchesses of Amer- DRNE AST “HE "SIGHT? 5p OF THE OLD WALDORF, MEADOW S~ \TS MUSEUM Time / ica who dwell (not live) in those shrouded midtown Fifth Avenue man- sions Ah mos’ lose whatever chivalry our ole Suthe’n mammy taught the ~Jovel— A. LNW Reo! boys o’ mah fambly. For years after that whirring contraption known as the horseless carriage ap peared, these sundry wealthy maidens clung to their shabby horses and red nosed, liveried coachmen with which you inevitably saw them im peding traffic as they rolled hither and yon, on shopping bent. After many years of this, the horses and the cab fell apart, and the Duch- esses purchased large, im- pressive motor c This new development took place about fif- teen years ago. Tratlic moved smartly for a while and the city was happy. Well, sir, thes« molly have gone back to being a nu ow they ercep about our these same cars of 1915 vintage, as unwieldy as they are expensive, and, moreover, with their large locomotive whecls and seats as pus as the top of the hrysler Building—thoroly antedated. I see them regularly in Central Park. ving the air and the traffic prob- lem ‘they causing by being fast asleep. Why not retire them to some large but quict museum (like the Metropolitan, for instance), where they can roll around the floors in ile outside in the city strects moves briskly along sans snorting, streets in Unimportant Items Tuer now call Union Square, th Si cene of many a football game be tween the Reds and the cops, Red Square. And, to add to the future ex citement, the Tammany Wigwam has shifted its quarters from the old Olym- pic burlesque building toacorneron Red Square. The sachems are pretty sore because. there a few “ignorant” folks who think their new tepee is Red Headquarters, (Cont'd on page 28) comicbooks.com