Judge, 1930-10-25 · page 8 of 36
Judge — October 25, 1930 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# "Judge" Magazine Page Analysis This page contains three satirical sketches: 1. **"The Football Coach Teaches an English Class"** mocks a tough football coach (likely a stereotype of the era) attempting to teach Shakespeare. His crude, aggressive coaching style clashes absurdly with literature instruction—he threatens to "kick the whole bunch of you out" if students don't pay attention. 2. **"Professional Gate Crasher"** depicts a man bragging about sneaking into Harvard's football stadium without paying, suggesting he'll do the same at other venues. The joke targets both gate-crashers and the vulnerability of event security. 3. **"From a Train Window"** is a poetic piece listing observations of American life—commuters, children, rural scenes—reflecting on society's ordinary details. The page satirizes American education, sports culture, and social behavior typical of early-20th-century concerns.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE The Football Coach Teaches an English Class “Cisos you bunch of dopes, let's see some action today ; ] you, there in the third row, let's bh t what Ham- j in Act 1, Scene 1. W! 3 ed? Il right, then, Jones, let’s see what you can do. Well, for Pete's °, are you fumbling, too? Don't you men realize that in English recitations fumbling is the worst thing you can do? Whatever you do, hang on to your lines. If you guys don't do no better than this tomorrow I'll kick the whole bunch of you out and get the Sophomore English class in here! “All right now, all of you get up to the blackboard there and limber up your minds a little bit, an’ make it snappy! “Well, that'll be all for today, but remember, I want cha to re port here on time tomorrow! An’ don’t go chasin’ around tonight, either. Get to bed early so your minds'll be nice and fresh!" \ PEE + “Henry Judson Simpson! What has gotten into you?” There is a show now playing in New York called “The Greeks Had a Word for It”, and that word, we sus- pect, was “ruzzbiff” ! The politicians ought to keep their hands off the scales of justice. “Gimme your shirt, we gotta have a sail!” From a Train Window Avtononites dumping — countless commuters, Clamoring kids speeding swiftly on scooters, Legions of youngsters on brilliant new Cunning kid brothers on trim litth tricycles, along with their juvenile Relishing rides on delectable ponies. Planes in the heavens and boats on the deep, Blustering busses that brazenly “beep”, Climbing the mountains and crossing the streams, Trailers and trolleys and taxis and teams— Reasons enough why the undersigned begs: What in the world’s going to happen Proressionat Gate Crasner—But I gotta get in—I got th’ to legs? a salaries for th’ whole backfield here! —Artuer L. Lippmann comicbooks.com