Judge — January 4, 1930 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Destructive Danny I remember Destructive Danny when he sat next to me in grammar school. He was about the most pes- tiferous pest that ever fired a spithall ata teacher. Everything he laid his hands on he destroyed, He used to push over his little brother's blocks every time the kid had built up a house. Through his college days Danny continued his destructive tactics. He was the first to tear out the opposing team’s goal posts and burn them up. When it came to celebrating alma mater’s victories, nobody had Danny's gift. Everything that came his way he ruthlessly smashed to smithereens, windows, fences, even feminine hearts. pu'd hardly expect such a man to success. A man with destructive instead of constructive talents, a man who delights in destroying, in. con- demning, in tearing down instead of building up. be Yet today Danny is worth several millions and rides in uxurious limou- sine. He is president of the Chamber of Commerce, a director in our strong- est bank and sole owner of the 1 house-wrecking com} —Artucer L. Lippmann “Oh, darling, I saw the duckiest little frock at Claire’s today.” JUDGE cM Beastly Rimes The Polecat The polecat’s always seemed to me Man's most pungent enemy. In point of fact, I must insist He's Nature's greatest egoist. Unlike his friends the Hares or Rabbits, He seems to have no kindly habits, But leaves the pleasant country- side More often sad than satisfied. —Gronce Mrrenece tr 18 Portrait of Two Gentlemen in Distress wsake, Bill! This one’s . too!” “So's that one on the corner.” “What'll we do?) Pm about all in “Only two A, M. and not one open in this neck of town!” “How about that) place over on Forty-third Street?" “Nope. [tried to get in at one minute after one yesterday morning and the guy slammed the door in iny fa “What's this country coming to?” “You said it, fella.” “T wot an idea. V to the first policeman we see him if he knows one that’s ope “Oh, nononono, Bill!” “He'd tell us, maybe.” “Yeh. But he'd think we're a coupla hicks, not knowing the town any better.” “Well, brother, what I mean is if I don’t get some food in me pretty quick, I'll keel over.” “Me, too, Bill. But if we keep milling around we're bound to find a drug-store that stays open all night.” —Cuer Jounxson Wo bust right up nd ask comicbooks.com