Judge — May 1938 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Objection ROWLERS in a Near Eastern ruin find a prehistoric instrument rough- ly resembling the corkscrew. The diplo- mat may have his foreign policy by de- scribing same and paying for this ad. An appalled commentator feels that something must be agreed upon to civil- ize air warfare—possibly a rule that the flier can't bomb any more orphans than he can eat. And yet the new Caesars are types that make for brighter history. They may be thoroughly mistaken, but always at the top of the lungs. It is an hour of trial for our sore beset utilities, though if worst comes to worst they may bend their gas pipe up into furniture and open a bar moderne. A French astrologer fixes a date for the world’s end at some time next fall. Others think if Europe comes through another 90 days of Hitler it will live forever. “To die for the sake of the Emperor,” Says a pamphlet handed each Japanese soldier, “is to live forever.” Probably a quotation from the fine print in the ac- cident insurance. None of the world’s statesmen, says a technician, has a truly A-1 microphone Sustained delivery. For radio, of course, the ideal voice has no substance, no sex and no owner, and a message of importance to every housewife. The ban on fan and bubble dancing alters the whole conception of New York's coming fair. The thing is to be little more than a larger Chautauqua. “Don't look now," murmured a little democracy to another in uneasy Europe, “but I think somebody is getting away with your liberties.” In Wisconsin a dairyman is fined for selling over-rich milk. So much for our quaint plan to use up any milk surplus by putting it into the milk. Who remembers when a new wrinkle in economics got no farther than a harmless $2 book that sold thirty copies to friends? They say home television sets will sell at cheap car prices and on easy terms. A missed installment, however, would mean a collector right in your dining room over 920 kilocycles. It looks bad for thieves who stole half a mile of steel rails at Haverstraw, New York. Justice is never patient with those stealing a railroad a little at a time. —Harry V. Wade. THE TIGER TALKS He is a God-forsaken thing— This Man, The sorriest animal since Time Began. He has no sleek soft fur to keep Him warm But wears a scratchy overcoat For storm, And no protective coloring— Pink skin A target for his creditors And kin. He finds no solace in the brush Or cave But only in the shaving brush And shave With tender feet in shoes he can Not run He cannot slink and stalk. He has No fun. The poor fool has to get about On wheels. He cannot struggle with his prey For meals But pits his wits ‘gainst cellophane and can. Oh what a blundering beggar is This Man! —ALLISON Ross. E LINE=== ZA sai every FRIDAY FROM NEW YORK 16 DAYS trom $285. INCLUDING OUTSIDE ROOM WITH PRIVATE BATH in the splendid Grace Liners SANTA ROSA SANTA PAULA SANTA ELENA * Dining rooms, high up in the ship, with wide case- ment windows, open directly onto promenade decks. Ceilings roll back so you may dine under the stars. * Outdoor Tiled Swimming Pools * All outside rooms, each with private fresh water bath * Dorothy Gray Beauty Salons * Pre-release talkies * Eight ports, permitting visits to 15 cities %* Shore trips, at slight extra cost, including 2-day, 160 mile auto trip thru interior of Venezuela, and full day at Panama Canal with opportunity to see Gatun Locks in operation. * No passports required. \e ign oe Vays tte re ZUE SOurH AMERICA Also 31 and 38 Day Cruises to —— = —_ PANAMA, COLOMBIA, ECUADOR, PERU, CHILE and ‘Round South America Cruise-Tours. Weekly sailings from New York ==———GRACE LIN Ez 628 Fifth Ave. (Rockefeller Center) or 10 Hanover Squore, New York Boston Washington, D.C. Chicago. «San Francisco Pittsburgh New Orleans Seattle Los Angeles comicbooks.com