Judge — May 1935 — page 9: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The Lawyer and His Love «6TN BRIEF,” she said, “to grant a kiss Would not be circumspect.” The lawyer said unto the miss: “To this I must object!” “T plead with you to marry me,” He said, his voice restrained. “Oh, that is diff’rent, sir,” said she, “Objection not sustained.” And so together, tried and true, > plain-tiffs mar their life. He is the law-d and master to His loyal, legal wife. To lawful domesticity He comes home from the courts : . With cases they can try while she “You wouldn’t happen to know which page those loop-holes Bakes lovely little torts. are on, would you? —Artuur L, Lirpaann. s Se eee Findings of the Jury CLERK: “Members of the ave you reached a verdict ?” Court clerk: Jury: “We find the judge hostile, iased and prejudiced; the witnesses cither senile, dishonest, interested, care- fully coached, previously convicted, or downright daffy; the prosecutor vin- dictive and rasping; the courtroom stuffy and poorly ventilated; the spec- tators giddy, morbidly curious; the seats in the courtroom uncomfortable; the proceedings unnecessarily long-winded, tiresome and tedious; the exhibits voluminous and contradictory; in fact, we find everything exactly opposite to what it should be in a court of justice.” aS ED Definition A lawyer is a fellow who is willing to go out and spend your last cent to prove he’s right. “Speaking of this and that, Halibur- ton, what’s your sister doing now?” “Why, Panorama, I thought you knew. She's studying law.” “What! A barmaid in the family!” And a guest artist is just somebody a radio comedian gets to pull the chest- : nuts out of the old jokebook for him. “Where were you last night?” | VSR DaAe. comicbooks.com