Judge — January 1934 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

MILLION taps are pouring very moment doesn’t grow reeling and the brain bad to have gin holy Cause and you came away wi aches. Put that all behind you. Liquor is here to stay. So n't attempt to drink it all up mediate Stick to the ryes, bourbons and the scotches and, in the long run, they'll stick by you. They're best straight or in highballs. Don’t mix them In fact, the less mixing you do the better. Most of the Prohi- bit cocktails were swillish atrocities, and an old-fashioned tender would grow green at e thought of them. Drink gin on hot days when collinses or rickeys app 1 before dinner. Above all, don’t unless ; or in a cockta drink gin as a beverag it’s to celebrate an anniversary Volstead After dinner, liqueurs and brandies. Wines have their proper times and places. If you drink during the evening, a highball or two or three, but not more, will do. The ritual f the old days indicated a glass nightcap. port as Beer is straightforward lrink of masculine good-fellow- ship. There’s fraternity in ale and porter. Stout Applejack should be taken in small crabapple size de it jars the nerves. Don’t go in for fancy punches. They produce quick, unsatisfactory drunk. After all, you don’t eat your dinner in one gulp. Don’t drink before six at night or after three in the morning. The bars will be open at nine in most States but a good brisk walk is better than a pick-me-up. Advice to Young Pickles a million snorts at this nd it is time to watch that the step Take 1 the brain as water. You did your hare in the past thirteen years to drink away law. You did your work nobly You rare of head- Don't say I didn’t warn you Don't get into drunken brawls. Remember. women will be present. Don’t for- tea It is just DRINKING AGAIN BECOMES ‘PLEASANT FUNCTION 8 get there’s a headache in everything except milk. The Good Old Days of 1933 INETEE thirty-three LN may have been hard on our pockets but I refuse to be- lieve it was hard on our he heads or spirits. If anyth , tones him uy and gives him a sense of what's what, it’s a lean year. And, aside from dispensing a few fur-lined caskets for the ninnies who couldn't take it, the undertaking institutions buried few really hardens a ma good guys last year. And my hunch is they'll bury fewer next So, grasping Pollyanna firmly by the throat and thrusting her behind me, I am going to look the year over. There was thick and there was thin. As for the thick, here it is. The Big Time Mono-man Bankster took his plac Natiorial Villain, supplementing the Bootlegger who, had he paid his income tax and kept his nose clean of murder, might have had statues raised to him in coming generatic Wall Street ve the country back to the people; Tammany returned New York City to its owners; and Notre Dame gave football back to the boys. Hard times drove the super- salesman out of the speake into oblivion and eating ar drinking a 1 ir, became a pleas- ant noiseless function. Bernard Shaw called on us, uttered a few million Dean Ingey (pro- nounced “Dingy”) words and decided not to settle down here, pre.erring to let us go to hell (Page 23, please) comicbooks.com