Judge — April 1933 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Judge JUDGING tH. sports commentators have passed out tons of lachrymose sympathy for a figure referred to vaguely as Gus H. Fan, John Q. Public and The Bleacherite. I, too, have shed a tear for the above martyrs. But now I hasten to tell the world I[ will weep no more. The truth about John Q. Public is that he just dotes on being made a_ sucker out of. Give him a fixed fight, an obvious phoney like a six day bike ra or a collection of nags such as run around New York at Jamaica or Empire, and he will batter the gates down in his feverish effort to get in. So how can you feel sorry for a guy like that? Just you watch the mob that will panic into the forthcoming Carnera-Sharkey shindig thi mer. They know that Carnera be- longs in a circus side show and that Sharkey is the Spanish equivalent of I poe years now many of our best a big bum, but will it keep them away? It will not! When baseball showed signs of slipping a few years ago what did the owners do? They stuck in the lively, or jack rabbit ball in order to give Mr. Bleacherite a thrill. Over- night Hack Wilson of all people, be- came a menace at the plate! Six day bike racing was getting into a state of chronic doldrums, when the astute Mr. Kramer int duced a system of “wireless pick- ups" and presto! more laps were stolen than you, I, and Horatios ever dreamed about. Result; the recent grind opened to a record crowd. Recently the local Greeks appeared to be more concerned with their fruit stands than rooting for Lon- dos. Immediately the wrestling crown was switched to Old Strangler Lewis. This was a bad idea, for Lewis behaved as though the racket was on the level. Night after night he insisted on flattening fellas without so much as a single dive out onto the concrete floor up near row Kk. So they seized on Jim Browning who had a hold in his bag of tricks that sounded like dough in the cash register and handed him over the diadem. When old Gus Fan tires of Browning and his histrionics th promoters will clip him one and we'll find Londos again on top of the pile. Cue for a song: We'll Be back To- gether Again! They do y that the dog racers in Florida occasionally find it ne sary to short circuit the electric rab- bit, just to give the hounds a break and the spectators a thrill. I quite FOR TNE CHAMFIONEN ID OF THE hieRLD SPORTS believe it, for certainly it sounds no cruder than the present em of Stanley Cup hockey playoff: Imay- ine a team finishing third in a league of four still being eligible for cham pionship honors? Anything for a laugh and a dollar in the till. Mind you the public knows that these things are being done to their spor and they voice disapproval with increased box office attendance. One can safely say that the only two on-the-level spectacles left polo and rowing. The form doesn't have to depend on box office appeal being a rich man’s toy and crew racing is passing out of thi picture because it is too honest: hence dull. What the gamblers can’ fix the fans don’t want. At les that’s how it looks to yours truly. However, if there is one persor who dotes on being played for a fish more than old Gus H. it is your average sports expert. Here is your real, dyed in the wool, sucker! Feigning a blasé, age-old wisdom about all sporting events, he is John- the-Sap, Grade A I watched some of the experts at the Carnera-Sch bout. For weeks they had rioned that the fight was to be a fake. The fans, as usual, stormed the doors as a result! Then, when the dying Schaaf was lifted from the ring, these experts stood up in their seats and screamed and booed with all the rest. In print the next day most of them proceeded to make further asses of themselves. Now, then if the experts were so darned sure of the fight’s phoniness why did they lose their poise and be- come part of the hooting, jeering throng?) The same omniscient gentry — on tried to make us_believ that Carpentier was a heavyweight menace. And, remember how the baseball scribes lauded the Giants into the second division last ye Truth is the boys d out so much hooey they fall for it them- selves. So let’s put away the cry- ing towel and quit worrying about Loyal Old Fan. If it’s on the up and up the boys don’t like it and empty seats never did pay dividends. —ReEx DEANE. ?)