Judge — July 25, 1931 — page 34: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

New York, N.Y. to Nome Address one of the more remarkable achievements of American business. prep school and college comp He could olso read and write, so our hero's porent gave him a telephone and @ desk in one of his downtown offices. JUDGE, 18 East 48th Street Please send Judge for [) | year, $5.00. City Sas tuceeasess e ON 52 LESSONS! We list the business career of Ferdie De Lower Lipp as Born of rich but dishonest parents at an ecrly age Ferdie was shipped to school, where he remained intermittently for a quarter of a century. At the 1d of this period he could draw a map of all the the Eastern United Stotes, including New Hoven. For months he was the laughing stock of Wall Street. One doy, however, his father came in the office unawares and caught him reading. “You can't get anywhere thot way,” he admonished his son. “Is that so?" the boy came back with stortling facility. Well, the boy's father was so amozed ot this sudden show of wit thot he gave him money to buy the bank and a suit with extra trousers. Ferdie had learned the secret. Perhaps you, too, would like to own o bank. Send us the coupon and cash for our 52 lesson course of study and then see what happens. 7-25-31 CTHE THEATRE (Continued from page 16) the customer's subsequent heated ar- gument with the grocer because the extra egg was rotten. It is all very well for me to admit that I like going to the theatre, but would my readers like going as regularly as I do and over so long and steady a period? | dare the average one to try it! I'd like to read his report when he gets to x be my aye. Reading it, I promise to write him a letter containing just two paragraphs. The first’ will read: “Why, if vou find so much fault with the theatre and bore yourself wi those rotten plays, Mr. So-and- you still continue to go to the the regularly after all these 1 second will : ly as had as you ‘ Nathan Recommends | in) Black” (Marris) Com wit Mack's choir, Pike Davis 1 band and Ethel Waters. ] “Once in a Lifetime” (Plymouth) —The | year's best farce. A satirical lampoon of the ] Hollywood z00. Gilbert: and ee Repertoire (Erlanger) j ] Gag relates that at y opening the audience, man, hissed the procced- pt one chap, who kept ap- yyRep ALLEN Broad almost to ings, ex plauding. Do you mean to say,” Fred asked him, “that you have the unmitigated nerve to encourage such rotten ing?” “Rotten acting, hell!” snapped the d-clapper, “I'm applauding the hissing.” —Warter WincieLL | in the Daily Mirror act- Simile | Busy as a xylophone player who is two bars behind. —Tep Coox in Los Angeles Examiner. D 2 years, $7.80. CD 21 weeks, $2.00. And another kind of bridge partner we usually draw, when we draw any, is the one who calls a spade two | spades. —Rvsset Crouse in N.Y. Evening Post. “It is said that the advent of the auto has increased profanity at least fifty per cent.” : “Maybe, but think how it has cut down horse stealing.” —Boston Transcript NTING CO., INC, JAMAICA, N. Ye comicbooks.com