Judge, 1931-03-14 · page 6 of 36
Judge — March 14, 1931 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Judge Magazine Page Analysis This page contains three separate satirical pieces: **Top cartoon ("If mah gal wants a pair of mules fuh her birthday—mules it is!"):** A man runs from aggressive mules, satirizing rural/Southern dialect and suggesting marital subservience—he'll provide whatever his girlfriend demands, even if dangerous or absurd. **"The Good Old Days" poem:** Nostalgic verse lamenting lost eras when figures like Sheraton Sherman and Nick Longfellow were prominent. The references appear garbled or intentionally distorted, likely satirizing romanticized nostalgia itself. **"A Senator at Home":** A domineering senator bullies his family relentlessly—complaining about household management, his wife's abilities, servants, and his son's behavior. The satire mocks the hypocrisy of powerful public figures who demand respect while acting tyrannically in private.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE “If mah gal wants a pair of mules foh her birthday—mules it is!” The Good Old Days He potter long for the days now departed When life was a wine full of wisdom and wit, When Neserole Perkins was Nick Papadoulas And Sheraton Sherman was Schlesinger Schmidt! 1 andiogain T am:scized within vearning or times of my ‘youth when’ the world was: serene: When Broderick Carlysle was Beppo Carlucei And Gwendolyn Gwithins was plain Gertie Green! delatve howe? And nights when the radio lulls me to slumber Si I dream once again of the days that have flown When Socrates Reardon was Samucl Rosen And Albemarle Condon was Abraham Cohn! ALL. L. A Senator at Home “Pant What a houschold! Nothing is ever done right. I'm going to start an investigation to learn what evil influences are behind all this. Just because you're my wife is no reason why you should yive me any of your backtalk. I'll sock you in the I don't take from anyone; not as long as I am a United States Senator. Hey! Junior! Why don’t you applaud when I’m talk- ing? You're as bad as your mother. There's no respect shown me in this house at all. Furthermore, woman, why is it that you aren't able to keep maids? Now, don’t bring that up again. I didn't confirm the appointment of that servant because I didn’t like her looks. Who's boss around here, anyway? Shut up! Junior, run next door and tell that old fool of a Simpkins to turn off that radio! I can’t hear myself talk. If he gets fresh tell him that I'll inves- te him. By God, you'd think I'm only an ordinary n from the lack of respect I’m shown around here. Answer that doorbell and tell whoever’s calling that I'm in conference and cannot be annoyed. Probably wants me to—ihat? It’s a superintendent of the Anti-Saloon Lea Are you sure? Well, quick, get busy, every- body. and straighten up this place. And Junior, put that unter in the pantry right away.” —R.H. comicbooks.com