Judge, 1931-01-10 · page 9 of 36
Judge — January 10, 1931 — page 9: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Political Satire from Judge Magazine This page contains two satirical pieces from the Prohibition era (when alcohol sales were banned in the U.S.). **"Please Pass the Poison"** mocks the government's plan to add foul-smelling chemicals to alcohol to deter drinking. The satire argues that American drinkers have become so accustomed to poisoned bootleg alcohol that they now *require* toxins for a "kick"—making the government's intervention counterproductive and unpopular. The cartoon shows police officers discovering a bottle, illustrating enforcement efforts. **"Modernistic"** is a lighter domestic humor piece about a bathroom painted in garish, mismatched colors—the result of letting a child loose with paint supplies from a Christmas gift. It's unrelated to the political content above. The author (S. Fitzgerald) uses exaggeration to critique government overreach during Prohibition, suggesting Washington doesn't understand American drinking culture and will only succeed in making alcohol worse, not better.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
—| Please Pass the Poison TT latest news from Wash- ington is that the govern- ment is going to stop putting poison in alcohol and substi- tute chemicals that will make it (the alcohol, not the gov- ernment) smell like a com- bination of bad eggs and garlic. s What I want to know is who su rested this change and wh. That's the trouble (at least one of the troubles) with the government. Always disturbing the fixed order of th The great American drinking public has got used to drinking poisoned alcohol, and American stomachs have developed a protective lining impervious to anything weak- - er than corrosive sublims In fact, most seasoned d ers nowadays can’t get any kick out of just pure alcohol. They want a little arsenic or something in it to give it a vallop. But, just as all the reaklings are killed off, and ] the people are settling down to really enjoying a steady 4 diet of carbolic id, the gov- Corp—But you oughta’ seen th’ one that got away! ernment wants to step in and spoil everything. Now I guess the govern- ment hasn't been reading the magazine ads. If they had they wouldn't go ahead with this fool idea of thei ting bad eggs and our gin is going to make them mighty unpopular, and the first thing they know not even their best friends will tell them, —S. Firzc D Modernistic M y bathroom has all the N ; colors of the The tub is a del egg blue. The walls vivid red with quaint splashes of orange and old gold. The floor is a spotted and speckled affair in seventeen different hues. The faucets are green and the shaving cabinet is purple. And it serves ine right. I should have kept my eye on Junior and the home- painting outfit he got from Survivorn—Captain, have you an aspirin tablet? Santa Claus. comicbooks.com