Judge — August 23, 1930 — page 22: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

AIG AH. Tiny Toddler nopany the best break the comic artists and jokesmiths have had in a gag’s age—which is about 3,000 years—is the (Bunny) Austin, at see them now, singi as they pull out the old Joe Millers and get to work revamping Ford jokes. Some samples of the crop that appearance of — the $45 fob. Tecan a gaysome lilt will come: The smallness of the car as an aid to parking will be shown by leaving it under kitchen sinks, atop other cars, inside a Queen Mary hat, in a valise and with other baby carriages in a dep't store. The lightness of the car will make it simple to attach handles to it and carry it out of a tratlic jam to wider, more open spaces. Ditto will make it easy for a driver pursued by a cop to jump out. climb a tree, haul the car up after him and proceed after the cop shot by. Should the car break down, the owner will push it to a service station with a handy perambulator attach- ment. It will be just the car to ride be- tween holes on a midget golf course. JUDGE of d for accidents, eme Five-inch book shelv vised for it; it will be refilled from a pocket flask or cigarette lighter when out of gas, Fred Allen will pull several lines like “Sophie Tucker took off her cor- set the other night and five Austins jumped out.” And “To saw a man seratching the other night, asked him what was wrong and he said he had Austins.” And “I was passing a mo- torist the other day and he ghtta get cried. your got a dozen Austins stickin’ to ‘e Innumerable jokes will be written = about leaving two Buicks together in hopes some morning you will awaken to find a new-born Austin shining up brightly in your face. Unimportant Item Ne" €LURS are practically extinct in New York, with the exception of dives in’ Harlem. Roof and roadhouses rely 1 an existence, with one A. M. and going that open merely for fellow night-club proprictors, pistol experts and Broad way columnists. News Found in a Bottle I can stand having liquors thrust at me for sale in de florists’, cleaning - dyei ments, undertakers’, dru; : motormen, white wings, bellhops. t watchmen and fellows on the side streets named Tony, but I become one thousand per ce nerican, sir. when they offer it at that old itching pst: the Barber Shop. Think of the angers of being shaved by who had been snuffing his “ (Continued on page 32 atessen shops. comicbooks.com