Judge — June 21, 1930 — page 33: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Me Bright beta by the ta This is f tired things. A Retentive Student According to the press, an English logist has finally translated the nt law of the Medes and the Per- We figured it out long ago: an’s Mede Is Another Man's —Jener, Nov. 39, 1929 Another student of history is George S. (“Toots”) Kaufm somewhat adequate actor now ing in “Once in a Lifetime,” ¢ tic City, who says that one Mede is another man’s Persian. —New York Worn, May 30, 1930 Bobby Jones says that playing golf is a matter of psychology. A 250- yard drive and accurate putting will also be found to be a big help. —Sovtiuern Lumperman Solution of Last Week’s Puzzle A Little Prod With Neptune’s Trident Continued from page 10 pag ) looking around, I have the eng smear her with grease and say: propellers weigh four tons api Miss.’ When Miss Snoopy emerge she thinks she must have been below decks, and, mind you, I haven't had to stop the ship to take the turbines apart, after all!” “LT always wear a sign on my back when I leave the bridge,” said the captain of the Rottingham, boxing compass. his sign is a great help to the passengers. It says ‘1. No—I never get sick, 2. Yes—the worst I've seen in my 40 years at sea, 3. hurried worried? No, thanks—I don’t drink beer. 4. ! Why, it looks like seaweed to me.” “Suppose an old lady asks you the best remedy for seasickness or please stop the fog horn, it keeps her awake?” inquired the captain of the Rollingholm. The captain of the Rottingham re- plied: “She gets washed overboard in the middle of the night and t morning I shout: ‘Man overbc 7 “During boat drill in mid-Atlantic last year a woman rushed up to me nted to know if we had struck an i g. I answered: *Yes—and we're sinking fast, madam.’ promptly had her lowered over the side. She drifted down through the Straits of Magellan into the Indian Ocean and, last trip, I picked her up off Ambrose Light. me she said: ‘I r Captain Hartney. When she saw mber you! You're May I sit at your sked the commander of the fleet, ving the lead line | through She did not! of the Boomdam window. replied the captain I stuffed her down a ventilator and a bon voyage basket of fruit from Dean’s after her. “I fooled one of these athletic fel- lows who walk around the deck from six in the morning till eight at night. This chap had knocked down eighteen passengers before he ran into me. On his 243d lap I opened a companion- way and he dropped into the oces through a coal chute. The discour: ing part of it was that he kept on walking and beat us into port by an hour and seven minutes.” “IL suppose now the North German Lloyd Line will build break his record,” said the captain of the Rollingholm, “Perhaps, but they’d better not Jaunch him during the shark season!” replied the commander, The captain of the Boomdam wet his lips and said: “How about a beer, mates?” “Man the pumps!” ander, yelled the com- aping to the bridge. a Then I! >» who will | HEN you haven‘teatencalmly, hen home cares or business cares pile up—do something to help your digestion. Chew the delicio pepsin gum which Dr. Beeman perfected 30 years ago as the most pleasant of all digestive aids. Today, Beeman’s Pepsin Gum is the favorite of millions who chew gum to help their digestions, Its keen, fresh flavor, its satisfying smooth- ness, and its mellow quality will win you, too. ‘_BEEMAN’S |'PEPSIN GUM | aids digestion | comicbooks.com