Judge, 1930-04-12 · page 13 of 36
Judge — April 12, 1930 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Judge Magazine Page Analysis This page contains three distinct humorous pieces typical of Judge's satirical style: **"Either Way, She's Wrong"** presents a dialogue between two men debating a woman's character. One man criticizes her for accepting gifts (calling her a "gold digger"), while the other criticizes her for *returning* the engagement ring. The joke is the logical trap: she's condemned regardless of her actions—a satire of men's contradictory, unfair standards for women. **"Beastly Rimes: The Zebra"** is a brief poem comparing zebras to wealthy people with "white hands and blue blood" (aristocratic imagery). It satirizes the upper class, suggesting they're decorative rather than useful, while working people grudgingly admire them. **"All New to Him"** depicts a former bartender (before Prohibition) attempting to teach cocktail-making. He's completely lost with the ingredients, revealing that Prohibition has made bartending knowledge obsolete—a topical joke about alcohol's illegality. The bottom illustration shows rural life disruption, captioning social tension over a hired man's romantic interest.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
that 4 Either Way, She’s Wrong “Y'know all those presents I sent Sure, And haven't I told you all long she was just a gold digger?” Listen, she... Aw, I know her kind, Joe. Just ut for all she can get.” Eddie, you got her wre Like fun T have! She took every pu gave her, didn't she?” ts what I'm getting at, she t every one of th back with the ring toda “Oh, she did, did she? Just plain nooty, huh? Well, Joe, you're lucky vet rid of a dame that’s as high hat as that.” thin; Lddic present The inspection of b: flies in Florida will probably continue ntil they find one. When you get right down to it, pea- nut brittle is nothing more than mo: lasses taffy with peanuts and sound effects. JUDGE Beastly Rimes The Zebra The zebra is a gaudy horse Whose picturesquely striped tors- O makes of him a thing of beauty Rather than a drudge to duty. We have human zebras, too, With hands too white and blood too blue. And we, who have to work, make fun of ’em But wish to hell we had been onc of ‘em. —Gronae Mer LL All New to Him He much of this stuff do I put in?” Two small glasses. That's Ver- mouth,” Then do I add this?” “Yes, justa dash. That's absinthe. What do you call this clear stuff?” That’ a Gin? Sure, What did you think it was?” Should [ put) some of that. in, toos Yep!” Very much?" “Yes. Half a tumbler should t« about right.” “Then what will this other stuff do to the drink No. T guess Pm awfully dumb, bat PI have to admit 1 haven't the slightest idea what to do with any of this stuff. [t's all new to m ‘How did you ever make a living?” ‘Oh, T used to be a bartender—be fore prohibition.”—Curr Jonuxsox mixture?" . don’t you know how to mix a n “Gosh, Mandy, it’s turrible since thet new hired man got sweet on our Sally!” comicbooks.com