Judge, 1929-12-07 · page 9 of 36
Judge — December 7, 1929 — page 9: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Judge Magazine Page Analysis This page contains three satirical pieces from Judge magazine (date unclear from image): **"Scramble"** mocks Wall Street's obsession with minor financial news—someone dropping a dime causes market excitement. **"He Didn't Get What He Wanted"** satirizes nostalgia for the pre-modern era. The figure longs for Victorian gentility (courtly manners, leisurely living, "mauve decade" aesthetics, Gibson Girls in bustles, stereopticon views) but is offered only an "old-fashioned cocktail"—implying modernity has stripped away genuine tradition, leaving only superficial retro gestures. **"Why Operators are Nut-Conscious"** jokes about a man's absurdly convoluted memory system for phone numbers, using nonsensical mathematical and associative logic (rhyming, musical references). The humor critiques both pretentious memory claims and the nuisance of remembering new phone numbers in an era of rapid technological change. The bottom cartoon's caption remains unclear without context about "Vice-President Number 46" and the "$100 loan to Mr. Dickelhoffer."
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE Scramble Nitt—Why the excitement at Wall and Broad St s today? Witt—Somebody dropped a dime. He Didn’t Get What He Wanted He yearned for the old order of things, the leisurely way of living, the indulgence of courtly manners... He hungered for a dinner, not of the modern mode, but completely apart from automat, cafeteria and delicatessen... . He sighed for the mauve decade. «+ His heart ached for the maidenly maiden of hoops and stays... . He dreamed of the bygone days, of laven- der and old lace, of bicycles built for two, of family albums and stereopticon views of Niagara Falls... He wanted... Varetr—Don't you think they’re a trifle daring, sir? An old-fashioned cocktail. —Davin S. Lensan ‘Why Operators are Nut-Conscious “You'd better give me your new tele- phone number, dear. “That's a good idea. Have you a peneil and paper “No, I don’t need one. I never for- get numbers.” “Isn't that marvelous? How do you do it?” “It's simple. Give me your number and I'll show you.” “9055 Schuyler. “Well, this is the way I do it. You ake the two fives at the end, which inake ten, don’t they? And then the naught to the left is one and you subtract that from the ten, which leaves you the nine at the begin- ning, see?” “How perfectly darling... and how about the exchange “Oh, that's just as easy. For in- stance, my aunt hi ler, that rhymes P| see? nd, come to think of it, it also gives me my two fives to start off with.” “How?” “He's about fifty-five years old, I think.” “But supposing my exchange hap- pened to be Chickering or some- thing?” “Oh, then I'd remember your num- ber had something to do with music and that stuff they make cheap cof- fee out of, so I'd just hum around a bit till I got the idea of a piano.” “It is simple, isn’t it? “Will Vice-President Number 46 please give his views on the $100 —Grorce Mitcuett loan to Mr. Dickelhoffer?”