Judge — November 30, 1929 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Patron Saints The Pedestrian’s Diogenes; he carried a lantern when he walked around, The Insurance Man's Methuselah; no risk at all, The Traffic Cop's Horatius; the first one to hold up traffic on a bridge. The Chronic Parker's Rip Van Winkle; he wasn't disturbed for twenty years. As the Holiday Season draws near Sandy is becoming expansive. He ordered his daughter's wedding to take place on Christmas so he could give the bride s an inan he’s unconscious. Other- wise they'd never get him to consent to taking one of those wild rides. Then there is the girl who made a farewell to arms when she refused to go out riding with college students. Gath ~ | JUDGE Beastly Rimes The Hippopotamus The Hippo is a bulky brute, At which the hunter loves to shoot, Probably because he’s sizeable A precaution most advisable; But, before you pull a trigger, Do not make him any bigger. As it is, he’s et a lot of us Naughty, naughty Hippopota- mus. —Grorce Mitreners. 1930 Material “How are we fixed for next season? Say, listen, I've got th’ best football material that any coach could) wish for, They're out on th’ field now, wanna sce them? C'mon. ‘There they » how tit? Not se bad, ch? Yeah, pretty husky bunch, and so far they're not givin’ me th’ least bit of Sce that big fellow over there ater pail, won't he make a All he needs is a little time And those three smaller ones down by the post, they're fast, them go when the They're small, but hav lotta guts, wn’ that’s important. Yes, sir, I’m tellin’ th’ world that I’ve got some real football material for next y That's th’ best litter of pigs I'v for years." —Scorr Brown addle-headed son was erying for a Then there's — the father whose axophone so he gave him one to keep him quiet. Everything comes to himwho waits, but the buttons from the laundry. “And we have to be sure there'll be room for Horace to hang his oar.”