Judge — April 19, 1930 — page 24: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE Strictly Equity FEe since the fellow was re 4 minded by the that he had to see a di hollows have been lyin idle with nothing to do but looked at. Why not. throw a pund them, charge admission, put on a that would combine building with pleasure and call the whole thing the Excavation Follic The show routines could consist of trained laborers who jump through flaming steam-shovels: fence show tap-dancing riveters; riveter choruses, singing “OV Man Rivet” or any other eatehy tune; while the hammer - throwers. uld star in the “Anvil Chorus” and “Turn on the Heat.” “Red-hot™ jugglers would be sure to wow dig; diggy-do” ; hustlers os em; rs could clown through “Diggy- and the Mack ‘Truck ild- spring Scotch eracks. The T.N.T. boys in “Going Up” would be a kno while a sketeh called “Getting Gertie’s Girder” could be played featuring an iron- worker named Gertie, if one could be found. io plot could consist of steal- ing a key girder which would eventually cause the building to collaps« but that could be worked out later. put; the 4S a permanent con tribution to the American Theatre. It would come in handy, too, the Theatre snild just about having worn out the Central European playwrights ind the wind coming from the Westley growing a bit tedious. [t wouldn't be hard to import a few critic lators are ne hard to interest in a scheme to inake them money. In time Fred F. French and the Fuller Co. would be the Ziegfeld and George White of the industry, and Ziggic French would be getting hot about competition and be through with the theatre for- ever. Roughly, you can. se the possibilities of the thing. And, since this is my idea, I'm going to see to it that nothing but good clean dirt allowed in any of these ex- hibits. Silence, please. Curtain going up! Check your hat and coat? 1 can whole thin see nd speeu- Hihatrocity It's getting so you can’t * the theatre break open a little conversation these days without someone wanting to play Amos ‘n’ Andy. ‘These two air-minded brilliants have swamped the mind of man, woman atharine to Shaw the Py curs and moron, Brash, what Tui ind Ella Cinders di the Amer! s world-wonders. pushing y said ck with n Mer One up-and woing newsrag is running a doubk barreled biography with pictures of the boys’ first panties and the heart iches they've undergone while putt together that first million. The press-agents have run berserk on. the front s with whimsey-wows such as: Tiny Tot Dies in Peace After the Evening Program; Guthrie Centre Sonagenarian Postpones Wedding to Sixteen-Year-Old Bride Fifteen’ Min- vids « five utes to Listen In: Chicago Exehange to Glad-Hand Radio zah, Cal., changes Names nd Tuesday to Amosday . And not only that, but Will Rogers has put his Grand Master’ Official Okay on the boys andr: over the air » longer smut of ps have it; they “Check an’ double check” and “propolition” will reduc party to floor-rolling screams of ughter; and even Coolidge has been known to forget to leave his cigar butt for souvenir-huntin; to make his hour. Well, we'v Bankers Close 1 how our cars are getting soiled with th spinsters in order raddiyo by the zero lived through Gallagher and Shean; bananas; Moran and Mack (in the bad days); and Rudy Vallee: so I'm just going to bide my time. comicbooks.com